(no subject)

[kallu]

Found myself thinking about childhood memories - there are a lot of inconsequential moments of conversation with the adults in my life that I remember vividly, that I think have an effect on me even now. My little sister is ten years younger than me; which lasting memories have I already participated in? I guess the only thing to do is make sure that as many of them are happy as I can.

Comments

[brin_bellway]

Yeah, one of the most unnerving things about interacting with children is how *breakable* they can be, easily damaged by things that most adults would barely notice.

Not long ago I asked a little girl at work if she wanted a sticker, she said no, and I remarked that she was the first one to ever refuse. It occurred to me as soon as the words were out of my mouth that that was exactly the kind of seemingly-inconsequential moment that can scar a child for life, so I reassured her that it was okay and she did not have to have a sticker if she didn't want to. I hope I didn't fuck that conversation up *too* badly.

[kallu]

The thing about this, though, is that there's no way of knowing that any particular moment will stick in the kid's memory. Most of the things that stuck in my memory are pretty insignificant moments - I think the affect that remains attached to them isn't so much a factor of the moment itself, but my general psychology at the time and my relationship to the other person. So I don't think it's worth worrying about single moments having an outsize effect. Better to just generally maintain a pleasant and open demeanor, since if you're overly conscious of yourself all the time that will affect your general relationship with the child. This of course only applies to children you have regular contact with. I don't recall basically any interaction I had with anyone I met only once or twice.

[nanslice]

Aww, yes. Being sure to make good memories is so important. :3

[kallu]

I do my best :)